Top News Headlines, June 5-11, 2005

Number of Bands Uncleverly Named
'Free Beer' Reaches 100,000

Studies Show Most Headlines
Written During Toilet Breaks

'___________ Is The New Black'
Offensive to African Americans

Breathing Deemed Unhealthy

Ogler Claims He's 'Just Trying to
Read Her Witty T-Shirt Slogan'

Man With Death Wish Steps
in Front of Rosie O'Donnell